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I grew up in what might best be described as a soccer desert. In the 80’s I survived off the crumbs of Soccer Made in Germany – a PBS slot that aired week-old Bundesliga games on Saturday afternoons. In 1996, it was ruled upon high that we should hereafter be blessed with the MLS, and there was much rejoicing. Then, in 2016, the powers that be said let there be an MLS team in Minnesota, and angels sang. My aim is to write about Minnesota United from the perspective of an obsessive fan, both in the flesh at the point of contact, and within the already fragile psyche of the Minnesota sports fan. When I am not writing about soccer, I teach high school English in Saint Paul.